Logic Stage Aspies?

[Night Elf]

You may have seen my post on the K-8 board about needing a person to plan my son's homeschool program. After lots of wonderful replies, I think the one that really stuck out the most was the one that suggested I had a preteen, entering puberty full on, and is a logic stage Aspie. Egads! That's quite a combination.

 

So, how do I get my son to work? I've always tried to accommodate his special needs by trying to make things easier, but it's getting tougher and tougher. He thinks nearly all schoolwork is stupid. He doesn't like following directions if he's asked to do more than write a few words in some fill in the blanks, or circle multiple choice answers.

 

I feel like I've done him a huge disservice and now need to try to turn things around. If you've gone through this before, what did you do that make things work? Gosh, I don't even know how to ask questions. I'm feeling totally overwhelmed! :)

[JennW in SoCal]

Hey there Beth,

 

I not only have been there/done that, but my son and I have lived to tell the tale! My aspie is a wonderful 16yo who still thinks most school is stupid, but is motivated to do it by the prospect of going to college and working in his field of obsession. I still modify things quite a bit in that I don't require as much reading and writing as I do with his younger brother. For instance he really enjoys projects where I have him make videos instead of writing a research paper, but he will be capable of handling basic college work.

 

Unfortunately I don't have too much positive to say for the ride through puberty and the logic stage. It was a nasty period during which I fretted quite a bit about what to do with him -- push, modify, or give up altogether! But a few things definitely worked.

 

One was to use his obsessions to my advantage. My ds was, and still is, a Disney freak. Over the years I have assigned every book I could find on Disney for him to read, including the recent thick biography of Walt Disney. In 6th grade I had him plan a fantasy vacation to Orlando, making a budget and itinerary, looking at the mileage in driving from there to his uncle's house. He also had to make up word problems about the average wait times for Space Mountain and other real world math applications. He now even owns Disney stock and learned about the stock market and basic economics from tracking it. He likes to read the business pages of the newspaper -- how weird is that for a teen?!

 

Another thing that helped was to find volunteer work that fit his secondary but related obsession, which is theater lighting (his ambition is to be a lighting designer at Disney). Since he was 13 he has worked for the tech team at our church almost every weekend. He never fit in with the youth group kids at church, although he does sing with the choir, but he fits in quite well with the adult techies and just blossomed under their mentorship.

 

During those years schoolwork was only done in small bites. It really was just the 3Rs, as it seemed that puberty made all his symptoms exaggerated and there was nothing left in him for any challenging academics. It took us 3 years to get through algebra, with the help of a couple of tutors. We did simple narrations from Story of the World, 20 minutes of math, watched lots of NOVA and the science shows on Discovery. As he came through to the other side of puberty we tackled logic and started but abandoned Latin. (Alas, there is nothing I could come up with to link Disney and Latin!!).

 

The thing that helped most was to find some outside accountability for him. We'd always been independent homeschoolers, but I decided to join a charter school when he was in 7th because I needed someone to back me up, someone else he had to answer to. Having to meet with a teacher just once a month gave him enough incentive to keep moving forward. Using a math tutor also helped move him along.

 

The last 2 years have been the wonderful reward for hanging in there during those tough years. He is funny, well liked, a capable but still impaired student though he knows how to adapt to his learning challenges now. He knows what he wants to do, which is still lighting at Disney, and is in demand as a performer and techie at local community theaters and church. He has one year left of homeschooling then will start community college.

 

The last obstacle I have to get past with him is learning how to drive, and that may just put me in my grave!!!

 

On a completely different topic, by the way, my younger ds is also a WOW freak, a level 50something Blood Elf. I took him to Blizzcon last year and see now his attraction to the game, though I have yet to start playing (I doubt my laptop can handle it!)

 

I don't know if that helps you through your current predicament, but at least I can offer a story of hope!

[Night Elf]

Jennifer, that is really great to hear! I've been feeling like he's not doing enough but hearing your son went through something similar and is doing fine gives me hope. :)