Does driving the interstate bother any of you?

[BamaTanya]

I've posted here about this before.

 

I am anxious on the interstate.

 

Last night dd was invited to a friend's house (maybe 18 miles away) and we all went so dh could drive. After I saw where it was, I knew how to avoid the interstate.

 

Dh can't see well at night and I offered to go pick dd up. One of my dss went with me just for the company. :001_smile:

 

The interstate was the straightest route and I attempted it, thinking that we were past the peak traffic.

 

Even though, it still bothered me. So I drove way out of the way (back roads) to return home. And felt mad/disappointed with myself all over again. Especially since I'm embarrassed that my kids see this. I want to be the one who takes care of them!

 

I tried some medication for anxiety/depression a couple of years ago. A couple of different ones, actually. And I did notice that the driving anxiety lessened.

 

However, the meds made me SO sleepy. I fell asleep every time I got still. Sometimes 2 or 3 naps a day. My energy was zapped. And I gained 30 lbs in 1.5 years. (Not saying I could blame all of it on the meds because I quit exercising during this time, too, and neglected to step on a scale. Snowball effect, probably >>>> no energy, no exercise, don't worry about healthy choices . . . )

 

I weaned myself (with dr's approval) and felt better depression-wise.

 

And then last night. UGH.

 

I can avoid the interstate in my daily life, but SERIOUSLY! How much do you *accommodate* your weaknesses?

 

This morning a friend mentioned a possible part-time job to me. We could use the $$ and it's right up my alley. Something that would fit into a homeschooler's schedule while being enjoyable and fulfilling professionally.

 

So I got home and hit mapquest to figure out the routes. All the suggested routes have interstate driving! I could bypass it but it would make a BIG difference in the commute time.

 

So I'm facing this again. Am I going to let this issue of mine paralyze me? Or do I just look for another opportunity that is more convenient and doesn't give me this extra stress in my life?

 

Thanks for listening.

[Word Nerd]

I hate interstate driving (especially in Colorado) and avoid it whenever possible and practical. Where I live now I don't need to, so it isn't a problem or something I even think about.

 

I understand how stressful it can be and hope you find a solution. :grouphug:

Edited July 30, 2011 by WordGirl

[kalanamak]

Think about it: interstate vs. local hwy with all kinds of driveways pulling onto it. Interstates are safer!!

[gardening momma]

I think it would depend on what area the interstate goes through. Are you in a huge city with massively wide and complicated interstate systems? (Like 5+ lanes each way) Or is it a rural area with 2 lanes per side? I've driven in both and in between. I don't hate the really busy parts, but they're not my cup of tea. I grew up in a rural area, so the interstate (called expressways there) was just another road, but faster and more convenient because of no stops.

 

Where I live now is a little bit busier, but still not a problem.

[Spy Car]

Tell me about your mother :D

 

Bill

[BamaTanya]

Think about it: interstate vs. local hwy with all kinds of driveways pulling onto it. Interstates are safer!!

 

I know that. But thinking about it doesn't help me experience the speed on the interstate. When I am driving the speed limit and there is plenty of room around me, I'm okay. But when other cars are zooming around me (not the majority -- just those few reckless ones who ignore law and courtesy) and cutting off other drivers and zig-zagging around, I am nervous.

 

I am comfortable with the congestion of city driving. It's not so fast and I'm better able to anticipate what other drivers will do. On the interstate I feel crowded and rushed ...

 

I can do it. But my heart rate increases and my hands get sweaty and I can't wait for the exit.

[BamaTanya]

Tell me about your mother :D

 

Bill

 

:lol:

[bzymom]

You might want to call some of your local driving schools and see if you can find a good teacher to help you become more confident driving the highway. It may be just the boost you need.

[BamaTanya]

I think it would depend on what area the interstate goes through. Are you in a huge city with massively wide and complicated interstate systems? (Like 5+ lanes each way) Or is it a rural area with 2 lanes per side? I've driven in both and in between. I don't hate the really busy parts, but they're not my cup of tea. I grew up in a rural area, so the interstate (called expressways there) was just another road, but faster and more convenient because of no stops.

 

Where I live now is a little bit busier, but still not a problem.

 

I live in the city so I get onto the interstate in the city. Probably 4-5 lanes each way from the entrance ramps until I get further out. I'm uncomfortable merging into traffic when there are so many cars. And then on my way home, I'm having to merge to the right with lanes coming in or ending . . .

 

I think I have trouble judging how fast cars are coming and I also have the sensation that they are coming toward me or don't have enough room ...

[Mama Geek]

You might want to call some of your local driving schools and see if you can find a good teacher to help you become more confident driving the highway. It may be just the boost you need.

 

:iagree: You might also be interested in a defensive driving course.

[NoPlaceLikeHome]

I have not driven on an interstate in over 12 years:D I will drive on local roads and state highways if I am familiar. We just moved to DC metro and thank goodness we live 2 blocks from the metro since I will not be driving down here;) I do hope to learn some of the back roads though eventually to the next nearby city. I do wish I could do this but I think it is in my genes.

[Parrothead]

The more I do it the easier it comes.

 

I learned to drive by driving on the interstate so I never had a great fear of it. I drove across the country (I stopped two hours shy of coast-to-coast) on the interstate alone with dd 3 years and a few days old.

 

Then we lived away from the interstate for a few years. I just about lost my nerve. That was disconcerting because I'm the one in this couple that normally likes driving interstate traffic in places like Atlanta, Boston, San Diego.

 

I'd gotten okay with driving to Bangor (I-95) fairly often. But it took two days to get to the point that driving in Boston was fun again.

 

All this to say, maybe it if you drive it more you'll become more comfortable.

[gardening momma]

I live in the city so I get onto the interstate in the city. Probably 4-5 lanes each way from the entrance ramps until I get further out. I'm uncomfortable merging into traffic when there are so many cars. And then on my way home, I'm having to merge to the right with lanes coming in or ending . . .

 

I think I have trouble judging how fast cars are coming and I also have the sensation that they are coming toward me or don't have enough room ...

I get it. I have a friend who didn't like driving in a middle lane. She preferred to be on one side or the other. I don't care for driving next to those concrete barriers with absolutely no shoulder when it's really busy.

[Perry]

Last summer I suddenly began to have panic attacks every time I got on an interstate. I don't know why, I've always enjoyed driving and had never had any problems with it in the past.

 

My kids have lots of out of town activities, and I have to do tons of interstate driving. After dealing with the panic attacks for months, I ended up going on Prozac. The attacks vanished instantly. I wish I would have done it sooner.

 

I did have problems with sleepiness with Prozac, and I switched to Zoloft, which has been great. If you decide to go back on meds, I urge you to see a psychiatrist for the prescription. They are much more knowledgeable than family doctors or internests about side effects, and you are more likely to get on a medication that is acceptable to you.

[ChristusG]

I will drive on the interstate....but it definitely isn't my favorite place. I'm concerned with the high rates of speed. One reason I dread road trips is because I think of the dangers of interstate driving. I worry that we'll be in a wreck.

[MaMa2005]

Come on over to ATL and we'll have you driving like a pro on the interstate. Nothing like 8-10 lanes of traffic with a crazy amount of signs to either make you or break you. Just kidding :001_smile:.

 

I would look into a defensive driving course. They would be able to give you some great suggestions on how to handle interstate driving.

 

I don't see well at night (almost no depth perception in the dark) and cannot judge how far away headlights are when trying to pull out onto a road. I have learned to just take my time until I am comfortable (as long as I am not where I can cause an accident). I've been honked at more than once, but I've learned to handle the honks versus getting too nervous.

 

Good luck.

[happypamama]

I used to dislike interstates. And then I moved to Boston as a newlywed. After driving there, anything's a breeze. No, really, I learned that I could sleep a little later if I took the Mass Pike (interstate) to work instead of the slower roads. Then we lived near Philadelphia and DC/Baltimore. Now, I actually prefer interstates and the like to back roads -- I prefer to get on the road and GO, rather than stop-start-stop-start (especially if I'm driving one of our stick shift vehicles). The bigger roads usually have signs that are easier to read, and the lanes are wide, and everything is more open and has better visibility. (Of course, when traffic is heavy, interstates aren't fun.) Except for the PA Turnpike; it leaves something to be desired, IMO, especially closer to Philadelphia -- too narrow and hard to see.

 

ETA: I would work on overcoming your dislike of the interstate. I think it's reasonable to dislike things, but when it gets in the way of something you really want to do (like a good job), that's when I want to overcome it. In your case, I would practice on the interstate during times when the weather is calm, and traffic is light, and practice going just one or two exits at a time (and ones that you know, or that your DH tells you have good exit/entrance ramps), maybe, gradually working up to longer distances. Practice is really what helped me feel more comfortable. (Also, I think it's great that you're concerned about what your kids are seeing -- my mom is not a confident driver and really dislikes fast driving, interstates, etc., and I think that dislike transferred to me when I was first learning to drive and left me lacking confidence.)

Edited July 31, 2011 by happypamama

[justamouse]

I hate it but I suck it up. And diving the interstate and parkway in NJ is wretched.

[DarlaS]

I hate driving. I'm an anxious driver in a lot of situations, but it does get better the more you do it.

 

I hate bridges. I especially hate bridges over water. I will be driving over this in a couple weeks. Twice. It looks so... out in the open. :001_unsure:

 

Then again the following weekend. Twice (of course). I'll let you know then if I hate bridges any less. :tongue_smilie:

 

 

Thankfully, it's much shorter than the Mighty Mac. :thumbup1:

[mom2denj]

I do not like the Interstate at all! I avoid it as much as possible. Just now on my 40's I am getting a little braver.

[Joker]

I've always felt local / back / state roads were more dangerous. The locals can drive crazier than any interstate driver I've encountered. I don't like the high speeds some travel on interstates but I just stay in the far right lane and drive the speed limit.

[gardening momma]

I hate bridges. I especially hate bridges over water. I will be driving over this in a couple weeks. Twice. It looks so... out in the open. :001_unsure:

 

Thankfully, it's much shorter than the Mighty Mac. :thumbup1:

I love bridges, especially Mackinac Bridge, which I think you are referring to. We used to drive over it 4x a year (2 trips to the U.P. and back). I miss it.

[DarlaS]

I love bridges, especially Mackinac Bridge, which I think you are referring to. We used to drive over it 4x a year (2 trips to the U.P. and back). I miss it.

 

That's the one all right. Oh, I do love to look at it. It's beautiful--but it's kind of see-through in places, and I'm terrified of heights. Like "I don't even like being at the top of the stairs" terrified of heights.

 

I haven't been to the UP. I have seen the bridge, and I do think we crossed it once (when I was a kid) but we went right back for some reason. I do want to go. My plan is for dh to be driving the bridge portion. That way my eyes being open will be optional. :D (I'll have my kids take pics. ;))

 

I actually have the Golden Gate bridge on my desktop right now. I love to look at any pretty bridge. It's just driving over them I could do without. :tongue_smilie:

[twoxcell]

I do not like to drive at all really especially on the interstate. We live in a fairly small town and only have two lanes on each side. My dh does the majority of the driving around here.

[Orthodox6]

I never found I-65 nerve-wracking, but it likely may have worsened since we lived there. (If that is the road you reference.)

 

Nonetheless, I can empathize with anxiety related to specific highways. When we moved here, I-75 was undergoing massive reconstruction. There were high concrete barriers everywhere, narrow lanes, and people driving like drunken racetrack competitors. I felt too frightened to be a passenger on that road, never mind to be a driver!

 

LBJ is the other nasty highway here. I can drive on it, and will do so, but only if it is the sole rational path to my destination.

 

Again, if you live in the city I'm guessing, there are alternate routes to most anywhere. Plus, it is not a large place, and nothing requires a long drive.

 

Relax, if you can. Not really an unlivable problem, I'm hoping for you.

[greenvneck]

You can't get anywhere around here without going on one highway or another. I have a fear of heights, which settled in during my last pregnancy (how's that for a side effect?), so when I have to drive on a cloverleaf over 4-5 other highways (pretty much daily), I practice labor-breathing and keep my eyes straight ahead. Otherwise, in general highway traffic, I just follow the car ahead of me, keep a peripheral view of everything, and sing loud enough along with Indigo Girls so as to drown out any crashes or sirens unless they pertain to me. :lol:

[Garga]

No time to read the other posts, so I may be repeating:

 

You said that you don't like merging...I understand! Here's some advice.

 

1. Don't forget about the shoulder. Is there any shoulder at all? If there is, you can continue to drive ON THE SHOULDER until you can merge. You're not necessarily supposed to drive on the shoulder, but if you're merging and you just CAN'T get in....then just keep speeding up on the shoulder. Once I realized I could do that, a lot of the stress was relieved for me.

 

Do not STOP on the shoulder and do not drive on the shoulder for miles and miles. But if you are trying to merge and there is sooo much traffic and you miss a window to slip your car into, that's ok. Just keep pushing forward on the shoulder until you get another spot to slip into.

 

2. The more you do it, the easier it gets. I sort of had the opposite from you. I drove that awful Baltimore beltway forEVER and got really good at it. And then I moved to this rural area. Here, the roads are all one lane, 55 mph, with no median between you and the approaching traffic. All I could think about was how we were both traveling 55 mph and there was only a painted line separating us. If the oncoming driver wasn't paying attention--BOOM! And the roads were curvy and hilly. I couldn't see what was ahead. On the beltway, you can see for a good mile straight ahead. The road is straight with gentle curves and flat. But in the rural areas, driving on windy, hilly, 55 mph roads was soooo stressful. AND, at night, there are NO overhead lights! On the beltway it is lit up BRIGHT all night long.

 

For the first 6 months living here, I almost never went the speed limit, because it was just too scary. I simply could NOT make a turn at 55 mph w/o knowing what was around the bend. I could NOT drive at 55 mph (or even 45 mph) on a pitch dark road where I could see nothing beyond my headlights.

 

But then one day it all just clicked, and I could do it. So, now I'm a happy camper because I can drive the beltway and the rural roads.

 

3. Do you have an underpowered car? I used to drive the Baltimore beltway with an underpowered car and it was awful. Then, I got a car that was properly powered and WOW! Was it ever easier to change lanes or merge. It didn't take 800 football fields to get up to speed.

 

Ok--that's all I've got.

Edited July 31, 2011 by Garga

[Spy Car]

I've always felt local / back / state roads were more dangerous. The locals can drive crazier than any interstate driver I've encountered. I don't like the high speeds some travel on interstates but I just stay in the far right lane and drive the speed limit.

 

Now the poor women is going to be house-bound :D

 

Bill

[KungFuPanda]

Putting yourself in the situation to do it regularly may actually help. I think it's more nerve wracking if you never do it. Taking that job could solve two problems! Put yourself on a program. Do it regularly for a month (if you can make yourself) before you quit. See if you feel differently after a month. Maybe focus on the gas you're saving and the lights you're avoiding.

[Veritaserum]

Putting yourself in the situation to do it regularly may actually help. I think it's more nerve wracking if you never do it. Taking that job could solve two problems! Put yourself on a program. Do it regularly for a month (if you can make yourself) before you quit. See if you feel differently after a month. Maybe focus on the gas you're saving and the lights you're avoiding.

:iagree: I grew up in a big city in Southern California. I was driving on the interstate as soon as I got my learner's permit because you had to in order to get to most places. The more I drove, the more comfortable I felt. :)

[Rhonda in TX]

Interstate driving doesn't bother me at all. If I want to get just about anywhere in a timely fashion, I have to drive on interstate. It's no big deal to me.

 

My problem, however, is driving through mountain/cliffside roads. I become a nervous wreck! I'm the person driving very, very slowly down that hill that drives you crazy. We went on a vacation last summer that required quite a bit of that kind of driving. DH did most of it, but I did need to do some because he would get tired eventually. For one stretch I drove for awhile, but DH finally took over because it was going to take us an eternity to get there with me driving.

 

Give me interstate driving any day over that!

[annandatje]

A couple years ago, I stopped taking expressway to work because of the frequency of accidents and resulting traffic jams, especially at intersection of two major expressways.

 

Ordinary interstate driving does not bother me. In fact, I prefer it over city streets because it is usually faster, safer, and more direct.

 

Could you overcome your aversion by desensitizing yourself by driving a little at a time when expressway is not particularly busy?

[Hannah C.]

Wow, I'm not the only one who has issues with driving!

 

I hate driving. It's not me I'm worried about, it's all the other people. So, traffic bugs me. Driving on the highway worries the carp out of me - even when I'm not driving. Part of the reason I avoid driving is because it freaks me out so much. I'm afraid that if I was actually driving I would get into an accident or have a panic attack or something.

 

Granted, I live in the DFW metroplex, off of a highway which desperately needs to be expanded. This might have something to do with my issues. But still...

[Joker]

Now the poor women is going to be house-bound :D

 

Bill

 

I really don't want that to happen! I just find it interesting how our experiences are so different. I grew up just outside of DFW and our local roads were much scarier than LBJ. I've lived in CA and now FL and I prefer the interstate to the local back roads because the locals know exactly where they're going and usually want to get there fast. The interstates seem safer to me.

[Natalieclare]

I hate bridges. I especially hate bridges over water.

 

 

 

Oh my stars! I hate bridges over water, too! I actually really like to drive and don't mind interstates a bit, but I detest bridges over water. I hope you sleep deeply on your trip!

 

When my oldest was a baby, I had to drive every day across the 520 bridge (shortly after the earthquake in Cali). The whole time I drove it, I mentally rehearsed how quickly I could reach back, whip her out of her carseat, get her out of the car, and tread water with her over my head. I don't have to drive that very often anymore, but I still hate bridges.

 

OP, I agree with the poster that said it's time to do something serious if your fears are holding you back from something you really want/need to do. ((Hugs))

Edited July 31, 2011 by Natalieclare

[simka2]

I drive on this everyday. You do get used to it!

 

http://www.westhouston.org/BW8_Base_Photo3.jpg

[mom2scouts]

I used to hate interstate driving, but now I'm quite comfortable with it. The only way I learned to stop hating it was to do it. There were some places I wanted to go with a friend and people I wanted to visit and my dh couldn't always be there to drive. I found that experience really helps lessen the anxiety.

[Mom in High Heels]

I only hate in because other people don't know how to drive on the Interstate. The left lane is supposed to be a passing lane, not a cruising lane! This is my biggest beef. Well, that and speed limits. 55 or 65 is ridiculous IMO. If driver's ed were mandatory (and more than just a month or two), I think driving would be far easier for everyone.

I learned to drive in Chicago and have now spent many years driving in Europe, where people follow the rules of the road (because they would get ticketed otherwise) and I can drive fast. Over here though, you can't get your license until 19 (IIRC) and you have to do a minimum of 1 year of driver's training (at least that's the way it is where we are) that you pay for yourself. Getting your license is expensive!

I drove through Paris 3 times and THAT is nerve wracking. There are many, many round-abouts that have NO LANES. It's insane. Drivers on the inside will just randomly cut across 8 or 9 other "lanes" to get to their turn off. Even tiny little Smart cars. I have to say it is amusing to stand at the top of the Arc de Triomphe and watch the circle below, but driving in it requires nerves of steel.

[Jryanbass]

I HATE driving through Birmingham city. HATE it HATE it! But just driving the interstate doesn't bother me.