keptwoman Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 I'm SO over this. I am ready to send DS back to school, I don't think that homeschooling should involve a constant battle on my behalf to get DS to do any work. I'm tired of it! When he does the work he is successful at it, so it's not too hard, it's in bite sized chunks. He has Auditory processing disorder and short term memory issues and today is particularly bad because he is tired. Please tell me how you get your children to work willingly. Because if this doesn't improve I will have to go back to school, my home should not be a battleground. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
at the beach Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 I'm SO over this. I am ready to send DS back to school, I don't think that homeschooling should involve a constant battle on my behalf to get DS to do any work.I'm tired of it! When he does the work he is successful at it, so it's not too hard, it's in bite sized chunks. He has Auditory processing disorder and short term memory issues and today is particularly bad because he is tired. Please tell me how you get your children to work willingly. Because if this doesn't improve I will have to go back to school, my home should not be a battleground. I'm not sure what age your son is, so I couldn't tell which one from your post. I have a dd 8 with learning differences, and I know of what you speak. It's HARD. My dd is doing much better with a Charlotte Mason curriculum. We are doing Ambleside Online Year 1. She enjoys it, for the most part. She is also enjoying MEP math, again, for the most part. What's helped is habit training and lots of physical activity. Making her do only a little but expecting it to be well done and then gradually increasing her workload. Copywork started off with just a few words. CM has been a blessing. It's working for her. If you have not looked at amblesideonline.org, I encourage you to do so. There is a special needs group at yahoo, too. Even if you never consider AO, there's a wealth of info on the site. Best, Anita Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keptwoman Posted May 16, 2008 Author Share Posted May 16, 2008 Sorry, it's the 8yo. You may be onto something with the physical activity, I wonder if a morning walk would help him be ready for the day. Thanks :) Keep the ideas coming, I want an ideas arsenal, because I really really want this to work! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 I struggle with my most challenged ds as well. Here's what works for us: Breaking the day into short segments: 15 min and he can have a break. (If he's working happily for longer, then great.) The break consists of going to the bathroom if needed (so I can say no without worrying if he asks to go during the next school segment), a drink, if desired, and some proprioceptive input (strong muscle-joint work). This could be anything from jumping on a tramp, to cross crawls, bear or crab walks, etc. (Lots of OT recommended activities.) He may also choose a visual-perceptual activity like tangrams, word finds, etc. during that time. Things that help with "alerting" and attention are: chewing gum, sour candy, drinking something thick like yogurt through a straw, being able to move a bit. (Like sitting on an exercise ball while doing keyboarding.) I let ds spend lonngg periods of time outside as well. That's supposed to be good for kids with ADD. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinmom Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 I have a little trick I use with both my 6 yr old DS and 8 yr old DD (SN). Whenever they are grumpy or having trouble staying on task, I have them finish a set number of problems (just a few), then tell them to go run around the house! Literally, I send their little feet flying in opposite directions around the house for 3-4 laps. They can choose to do it inside or outside, including stairs or not, to have a "race" with their sibling or just run. They love it, and it wears them out so that when they come back to the table, they are happy to sit quietly. I swear it helps them focus, too! I guess they can concentrate better after they blow off some steam. They enjoy physical activity, so on tough days I may also throw in a "verb review!" I'll do grammar by throwing out different verbs (sometimes with different tenses) and they have to act them out! Throw in a few adjectives and adverbs, and you have a pretty good game. They enjoy doing this for a reward after finishing some of their more tedious work. Oh, and I have DS (the bouncy one!) sit on a "wiggle seat" during his seat work (Google "balance trainer.") It really seems to help him focus as well, since he has to physically concentrate on staying on the little balloon. Hang in there...I know it's tough. Try looking at the end goal instead of the day to day battles. You are doing a wonderful thing for your son! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mindytom121 Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 My 8 yr old dd is learning disabled and ADHD and has her days when she just is unable to work. It helps when I am tuned in to what her particular needs are for that day. Some days she needs a wiggle cushion to sit on, or may have to do some heavywork (jumping on tramp, chewing gum, wall pushes etc..) and some days she is able to work very well. I try to roll with it and not get into power struggles. I usually respond with "Ok, you can't do this now, but it does need to be done by lunchtime. If it is not done you will not have tv or computer time today." Then the choice is up to her--although I do have to remind her before her time is up and she usually makes the right choice. If she doesn't it isn't my fault and she has to pay the consequence and learns very quickly that mom means what she says when she asks for something to be done. I also believe in rewards. It helps change their thinking and eventually can be phased out as the new habit develops. The main thing I have found helpful is to avoid the power struggles! Hope this helps. Mindy Tom mom to 6 daughters Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathy in MD Posted May 16, 2008 Share Posted May 16, 2008 My ds likes to have a set time for work. He also likes to have imput into which subjects are studied first. He will often change the order or ask to substitute lessons depending on how he's feeling. On occasion, I'll let him switch which day we do history and science. I'll also delay tough lessons when he's not feeling well. On work that is difficult, make sure that you do plenty of instruction and handholding before and while doing the assignment. Give him a break immediately after completing it. Work on commenting on what is right and why it's right and ignoring what is wrong. (You re-teach the missed information in the next lesson.) I struggle with this constantly, but the benefits are amazing. The woman who taught me this tried it with her ds. He gave her a sheet of appallingly bad handwriting. She finally found an "o" that looked reasonable and told him what she liked about it. He immediately chose to work on making even better "o"'s. Later he was heard to brag, "My handwriting's not good, but I make great "O"'s ". Do as much work as possible together. I find that my ds is less frustrated and learns more if I read the answers and he grades his papers. He also loves any subject where we sit together on the sofa and read and discuss it (Mind you, this is a **14*** year old we're talking about!). My hater-of-reading, comprehension-struggler is even asking to finish reading **Plato** with me! Finally, if he's an only child, consider getting him a puppy for recess and study breaks. My ds is much happier with a companion. Plus, the puppy ALWAYS needs to go out after a hard test or lesson ;) We still have our bad days or times. And sometimes the child hits a development level that seems to demand struggles and fights. Turning 14 recently seemed to end the latest problem level for my ds. (Of course, we also got the puppy bout that time. :) But all the ideas presented to you have helped us in the past. One more suggestion, sometimes Mom needs a break. Take it; in a bubble bath, a walk or in a time-out in your room with a good book. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keptwoman Posted May 18, 2008 Author Share Posted May 18, 2008 Thanks everyone. You've given me some food for thought :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted May 18, 2008 Share Posted May 18, 2008 Do you think he might have ADD/ADHD? If so, if the other ideas given are not enough, it might be worth trying medication. I would BATTLE everyday with my now 11dd. We started her on Dexedrine and now she can sit and focus and complete with work with NO problems. Every once in a while we will have a bad day.......I go check her med container and low and behold almost every time her Dexedrine is still in there. I have her take it, give her 30-45 minutes to play and then she sits right down and works. Meds are not the cure all for every problem but when they work, they REALLY work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keptwoman Posted May 19, 2008 Author Share Posted May 19, 2008 No, definitely not ADD or ADHD. Focusing isn't the problem really, once he is willing to sit he will sit and do the work well, it's getting him to stop mucking about and put his bottom on the chair in the first place. Today went better, I had all his work laid out for him and his HST printout on top of the lot. He had started before I even got up, and finished all but history by 11am. YAY!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dtsmamtj Posted May 23, 2008 Share Posted May 23, 2008 For our son it help to keep things in shorter segments and let him know that at the end of say math and reading, we will take a break outside for 10 minutes, etc. HTH T Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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