missmoe Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 If a child does not look their parent, please don't feel like you may ask why! If a child does not look like their parent, please don't make a snide comment! to the parent OR exspecially the child! Please do talk to your children about things like this, so they do not feel it is okay to do the above mentioned thing! Okay, (deep breathe) that is all. Off to take a :chillpill: pill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snickerdoodle Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 I'm sorry. People can be so thoughtless sometimes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beccad777 Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 :confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amirah Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 oh i know what you mean I hate this!! I am black and my husband is from north africa and is a white/tan color and our baby is white with curly hair he looks nothing like me and we aren't the same skin colors all the time people ask me if its my kid or make comments about him and its really annoying Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kchara Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2squared Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 :grouphug: Not only are the mailman jokes not funny, but they are quite insulting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I am lily white and my son is half Korean. I actually never get comments. I guess I'm pretty lucky. I'm sorry you got comments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnitWit Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 :grouphug: Years ago, we were friends with a couple, both of whom had very dark, nearly black, brown hair. They had two biological dd's, both of whom had *white* blond hair and very fair skin. The dh had to take a short term contract job in Alaska and took his family. They drove there in their own car with tags from the lower 48. They had not been there long when a clerk in their local grocery decided to do a *good deed* and report to the local police that she suspected a kidnapping. It was quite traumatic for them. All due to *assumption*. I'm so very sorry. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I've been accused of fooling around on Wolf cause Tazzie was blonde and blue eyed as a baby :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T'smom Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zaichiki Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Some people are just ignorant. My two oldest and I were at a group playdate once. I started chatting with a mom I hadn't yet met while we were watching the kids play. She pointed out her kids. I pointed out mine. Then she asked me if they were the same race. (They are full siblings. Our ethnic/regional heritage is all European: northern, central, and eastern.) One of my kids tans darkly in the summer and the other is very fair with red hair and freckles. But STILL -- who ASKS someone if their kids are "the same race?" ??? Seriously. I was like, "wha?" I think I actually said they were full siblings but simply inherited different skin shade genes. Really, though -- I avoided her after that interaction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatMomof3 Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 My dh is brown (mother is from Guatamala) and I am white (Finnish descent), I have been asked if I adopted my son - he looks like dh AND dh gets looks when he is at the store with 3 year old dd - she is white with blond hair and blue eyes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LisainOhio Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Ugh, sorry. I know how icky it can be. My daughter is Guatemalan and hubby and I adopted her when she was an infant. She's 6 now and we've had our share of comments. I'm very fair, red hair and blue eyes and she's very dark brown with black hair and nearly black eyes. I had her in a cart at Target once when she was about 15 months old and some lady was staring and I felt like she was following me around. She finally ended up in front of me and said "Now sweetie, is her father really dark like a mexican or something?" She had the most disgusted look on her face and I was SO tired and annoyed that day that I just said "I have NO idea who her father is" then walked away. I felt sort of bad after but it's funny to me now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheryl in NM Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 :grouphug: Not only are the mailman jokes not funny, but they are quite insulting. In a very small town in S. WI my red-headed brother was born to my brunette mom and black haired dad. The ladies at church started wagging their tongues. So to shut them up my mom said, "Well of course he belongs to the milk man!" :001_huh: The milk man was red-headed! :tongue_smilie: We laugh about it now, but I'm sure it was horrendous then. People can be so stupid! I'm sorry you had that happen to you. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarreymere Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 If it helps any, I've been told several times how much my foreign-born adopted stepson looks just like me :D People are just weird and intrusive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 If it helps any, I've been told several times how much my foreign-born adopted stepson looks just like me :D People are just weird and intrusive. I was asked if my Eurasian son (black hair, tan skin and brown eyes) and his Russian (white blond hair, fair skin & blue eyes) friend were twins:confused: People are just weird. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 If a child does not look their parent, please don't feel like you may ask why! If a child does not look like their parent, please don't make a snide comment! to the parent OR exspecially the child! Please do talk to your children about things like this, so they do not feel it is okay to do the above mentioned thing! Okay, (deep breathe) that is all. Off to take a :chillpill: pill. Amen, sister! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newlifemom Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I know I must have mentioned this here already but . . . I am about as white as they come and I married a Chinese man. My dc are beautiful. At one point a friend of mine was holding my oldest, then 2yrs when a couple of sweet, but rather stupid, ladies from church walked by. They ohh'd and ahh'd and then one said to the other, "She still looks Chinese, you'd think she'd have outgrown that by now." I am still :001_huh: about that comment. To the OP, I am sorry for the thoughtless remarks. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleWMN Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I'm Caucasian and have a black daughter. Yeh, been there. :( But, fir the most part people are great... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IlluminatedAttic Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 My dh is Latino so although I'm not that fair skinned my children are darker than I am. When dd was a few months old the manager at a local craft store came down an aisle toward me loudly cooing, "Ooh she's so beautiful! Where did you get her?" I was taken aback and stammered out, "She's mine." The woman reassured me, "Of course dear, grows in your heart and all that. But where did you get her from?" After I firmly stated that she is my biological child the woman look incredulous and walked away, only to return a few minutes later to explain that, "There was a just one of those Asian families in here. That's why my mind was going that way. Of course now that I see her from this side she looks exactly like you!" :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sputterduck Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I know I must have mentioned this here already but . . . I am about as white as they come and I married a Chinese man. My dc are beautiful. At one point a friend of mine was holding my oldest, then 2yrs when a couple of sweet, but rather stupid, ladies from church walked by. They ohh'd and ahh'd and then one said to the other, "She still looks Chinese, you'd think she'd have outgrown that by now." I am still :001_huh: about that comment. To the OP, I am sorry for the thoughtless remarks. :grouphug: :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElizabethB Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 :grouphug: My brother and I look exactly like my dad and not much like my mom. People would still make mailman jokes to us. We had a standard reply that still cracks me up when I think about it, "Yeah, right. Actually, it's mom we worry about, but she claims to have been there when we were born." No one every had a reply to that one, they just changed the subject and never mentioned mailmen again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyJoy Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 (edited) My blonde-as-a-child sister used to get asked if she was adopted by adults from the time she was little--maybe 4 or 5. What kind of thoughtless person asks a preschooler that! She actually got to the point where she doubted my parents when they told her she was not adopted.:glare: She kept claiming she'd never seen pictures of herself as a baby so we pulled them out repeatedly for her. When she was 8 or 9, she got sick of the questions. In a group setting, someone asked her once again and she broke down crying. She sobbed and blubbered, "Yes, I am adopted! It hurts when people bring it up. Why do you have to ask me about it?" The questioner got very uncomfortable, apologized, and tried to comfort her. At this point, my sister snapped out of her fake crying and said matter-of-factly, "I'm not adopted, but that was a rude question!" and walked off.:D I've always admired her for having the guts to do that! Edited May 22, 2011 by AndyJoy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NCJessieRN Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 (edited) If a child does not look their parent, please don't feel like you may ask why! If a child does not look like their parent, please don't make a snide comment! to the parent OR exspecially the child! Please do talk to your children about things like this, so they do not feel it is okay to do the above mentioned thing! Okay, (deep breathe) that is all. Off to take a :chillpill: pill. I totally understand this! My husband is Puerto Rican with black hair, and very dark eyes and skin. My youngest two both are very pale with blonde hair one with hazel eyes and one with blue. I have actually had people ask us if my husband is the father:confused:. I don't get it! :grouphug: to you! Edited May 22, 2011 by NCJessieRN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacyandtherugrats Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 :grouphug: Two of my five rugrats are adopted from Korea. We often get the adopted comments. People for the most part just don't 'think' (at least that is what I tell myself after rude comments). It is the rare few that really are just darn rude. They are getting old enough now that if someone asks in front of me about them, I am not happy. What type of person asks 2 girls that are obviously part of a family 'are they sisters?' or 'are they your daughters?' I can handle the rude comments but to say things like that in front of children is just plain wrong. Idiots. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarlaS Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 :grouphug: Not only are the mailman jokes not funny, but they are quite insulting. My oldest brother looks nothing like either of my parents. My mom used to get "milkman" jokes. This was in the late 50's and there actually was a milkman. The milkman was my dad's brother--who looked exactly like my dad (He was shorter, but they could have been twins)! Figure that one out... :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alice Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Some people are just ignorant. My two oldest and I were at a group playdate once. I started chatting with a mom I hadn't yet met while we were watching the kids play. She pointed out her kids. I pointed out mine. Then she asked me if they were the same race. (They are full siblings. Our ethnic/regional heritage is all European: northern, central, and eastern.) One of my kids tans darkly in the summer and the other is very fair with red hair and freckles. But STILL -- who ASKS someone if their kids are "the same race?" ??? Seriously. I was like, "wha?" I think I actually said they were full siblings but simply inherited different skin shade genes. Really, though -- I avoided her after that interaction. I had someone ask me at a fast food place playground if my boys had different fathers. I was so taken aback at someone asking a complete stranger such a rude question I was somewhat speechless. I know I must have mentioned this here already but . . . I am about as white as they come and I married a Chinese man. My dc are beautiful. At one point a friend of mine was holding my oldest, then 2yrs when a couple of sweet, but rather stupid, ladies from church walked by. They ohh'd and ahh'd and then one said to the other, "She still looks Chinese, you'd think she'd have outgrown that by now." I am still :001_huh: about that comment. To the OP, I am sorry for the thoughtless remarks. :grouphug: I'm torn between :001_huh: and :lol:. That's just so stupid it's almost funny. I'm also lily white (red hair, very fair) with a Chinese husband. I think our kids are beautiful also. ;) They all look more Caucasian than Asian but not really like me. I don't think they look like either of us, but they do look like each other. Typically the comments I get are usually nice. I get asked a lot if they are mixed race but usually it's someone saying someone who is asking because they also have mixed race kids or grandkids and are just being nice (maybe a little nosy but nice). Or it's a comment that is nice about how mixed-race kids are beautiful. To which I can only smile and agree. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I know I must have mentioned this here already but . . . I am about as white as they come and I married a Chinese man. My dc are beautiful. At one point a friend of mine was holding my oldest, then 2yrs when a couple of sweet, but rather stupid, ladies from church walked by. They ohh'd and ahh'd and then one said to the other, "She still looks Chinese, you'd think she'd have outgrown that by now." I am still :001_huh: about that comment. To the OP, I am sorry for the thoughtless remarks. :grouphug: What? :001_huh::glare::lol::lol: Some people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JessReplanted Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 My two girls are 1 year apart (3 & 4). God brought us our middle daughter through adoption. She has beautiful olive skin and brown hair. My youngest daughter is one of the whitest little girls you could imagine. I've gotten various comments about how different the two of them look and how surprised people are to find out that they are sisters. But the funny thing is that b/c I have brown hair, many people assume that the blond child was adopted. :lol: For the most part it doesn't bother me. At the same time, my middle daughter is also the child who points out the most obvious differences in others - to the point that it is just embarrassing. She drilled my Af.Am. friend about her skin being dark and her teeth being so white. :blink: And I promise - I have had conversations with her about how God made us all different, and we do not determine who people are by the way they look. I've tried. Sometimes her intense curiosity and above average vocal skills make a challenging combination. (So please, try to have grace for kids like mine!!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TxMama Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I'm native american and I have 2 blond, fair, blue-eyed children. I have been asked which adoption agency I used. I have been asked "Where is her mother"....assuming I'm the babysitter? People have assumed that my oldest son (age 21) is the youngest dd (age 5) dad and I'm raising my grand kid. People have assumed that my youngest is my DH's from an affair and I was gracious enough to raise her! :001_huh: I agree that the worst is when they ask the kid the question! My youngest has asked, "Who is my "real" mommy....you know the yellowed haired mommy." So someone has been asking her about the situation. She very innocently refers to me as her "black-haired mommy" and her older sister as "Hannah-mom" but she just doesn't know who her yellow haired mommy is. I carry her birth certificate and have a dear friend who was at my delivery on speed-dail just in case. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiCO Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I'm native american and I have 2 blond, fair, blue-eyed children. I carry her birth certificate and have a dear friend who was at my delivery on speed-dail just in case. :glare: Ugg. People can be so rediculous! My mother was native american, and I have many first cousins on her side who are very fair. My kids are both blond and blue-eyed. Have people never studied genetics? I know quite a few full-blooded indians with pale eyes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roxanne23 Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 (edited) . Edited January 4, 2023 by roxanne23 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OLG Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I grew up with this as a kid and always cringed when this question arose. My parents adopted me, a brown eyed girl (at birth, back in the dark ages) and they are both blue eyed. I get it!! You would think that in this day things had improved and people would be more conscious of not only adoptions but multi-cultural families but it takes a long time to gain some sense, I guess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTJo1996 Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I am laughing at all of your stories but it really does unnerve me when someone asks a personal question. Especially someone you have absolutely no connection with. I mean when did the "tact" line get erased? But I have a funny story too. My best friend from college is very pale and has dark hair and ice blue eyes. She looks nothing like her 3 kiddos who inherited dad's easily tanned skin and blonde-ish hair. When her 1st child was a toddler, she was at Publix picking out produce when out of the blue, a lady said "It is SO nice that caucasian people can still adopt a caucasian baby. Where did you get him?" My friend started to unbutton her pants and asked "Would you like to see my c-section scar?" I still love to share this story as an example of the stupid things people say! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I really think it depends on how it is asked. I have a child who is a different race and usually I am not offended when people ask where he is from or if we adopted him. Dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
m0mmaBuck Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 It doesn't even have to be strangers. DH's grandmother stood up during an extended-family Thanksgiving dinner and announced to G-d and country that she didn't think DS was DH's child because DS looks nothing like DH and ALL babies in their family take after their family. People can just be rude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 In situations like that I try to remember Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. I have a friend who is from Guatemala and her dh is an blond haired and blue eyed German. One son looks just like her and the other looks just like her dh. When he was a baby she used to get comments along the line of how great it was she could bring her child to her Nanny job. Then when he was in school and she came in for a conference the principal commented that they like to meet with the parents not the nanny. She has learned to laugh at it. On the flip side, my kids are friend with 2 girls who were adopted from China. They are obviously Chinese and the parents are obviously not. Recently I said something about not being able to get together because they were away at an adoption reunion and my dd looked at me and in the most surprised voice said "They are adopted?" It just never occurred to her to question why they looked so different from their parents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom4him Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 If a child does not look their parent, please don't feel like you may ask why! If a child does not look like their parent, please don't make a snide comment! to the parent OR exspecially the child! Please do talk to your children about things like this, so they do not feel it is okay to do the above mentioned thing! Okay, (deep breathe) that is all. Off to take a :chillpill: pill. I totally agree. The biggest question I get, generally from store checkouts, is, "Are these your grandchildren?" I have been know to tell them, NO, my name is Sarah thought.:lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
creativish Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 This reminds me of my BIL and SIL, they both are blonde with pale skin and blue eyes. Their first son they adopted from birth and he looks JUST like them!!! I have even mistakenly said how much he looks like his dad. :o They adopted a second son and he too has light skin and blonde hair, but brown-eyed. But half of BIL's relatives have brown eyes too. I'm guessing they don't get asked much about who their "real parents" are. :rolleyes: It still blows my mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Ugh, sorry. I know how icky it can be. My daughter is Guatemalan and hubby and I adopted her when she was an infant. She's 6 now and we've had our share of comments. I'm very fair, red hair and blue eyes and she's very dark brown with black hair and nearly black eyes. I had her in a cart at Target once when she was about 15 months old and some lady was staring and I felt like she was following me around. She finally ended up in front of me and said "Now sweetie, is her father really dark like a mexican or something?" She had the most disgusted look on her face and I was SO tired and annoyed that day that I just said "I have NO idea who her father is" then walked away. I felt sort of bad after but it's funny to me now. LOL. Hilarous response you gave her. People just think they can say whatever pops into their mind. Filterless minds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KrissiK Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I really think it depends on how it is asked. I have a child who is a different race and usually I am not offended when people ask where he is from or if we adopted him. Dawn :iagree: We have three adopted children (no bio kids). Our oldest DS is bi-racial (hispanic/black), his bio half-brother is hispanic and his sister (no bio relation) is hispanic and they are all shades of brown. DH and I are quite caucasian. It always cracks me up when people ask where we adopted the kids from (the implication is that they're from another country). We live in a highly hispanic populated area (around 80%) and people still think we adopted internationally. I mean, our kids look like every other kid running around our town. It's been interesting the last month or so because DS1 is on a Little League team with another bi-racial boy who's dad is black and from the Caribbean and his mom is Caucasian. The two boys are built exactly alike (and unlike any other kid on the team) and they look very similar. It's uncanny, actually. The other day DS asked me if he was from another country "because M's dad is black and he's from another country". I answered him simply and honestly (no, you're from this country), but he's really starting to notice and question things about his skin color. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgehogs4 Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 While I agree with the OP because culturally it is rather tactless to make comments of that nature, I also try to understand that people are just people--they are genuinely curious about observing the unusual and don't always know how to express it well. But really--is it that odd to wonder why someone is a mother of a child who is obviously of a different race than she? When my 1/2 Japanese son was born people often asked if I had adopted him. I could understand why--I'm blonde / blue-eyed and he was very Asian-looking as a baby. He now looks more like me, but still... We are one of only a few cultures where statements of the obvious and questions of the unusual are offensive...we as a culture are really overly sensitive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zaichiki Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Sometimes her intense curiosity and above average vocal skills make a challenging combination. (So please, try to have grace for kids like mine!!) If a 4 year old *child* asked me a question about my kids' skin tones being different, I would just explain about how people can inherit different skin tones from different family members. But if a random adult "off the street" asks about my kids' skin tone differences in a rude way -- I just want to slap them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zaichiki Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 I'm native american and I have 2 blond, fair, blue-eyed children. My mother is European with one parent with lighter skin/blue eyes and one parent with olive skin and dark eyes/hair. She and half of her siblings got the darker skin tone, eyes, and hair. That's genetics -- and you'd think that most people could handle that much. My dad (and his whole family) have lighter skin and blue eyes. So do my brother and I. When I was a kid people ALWAYS assumed my mom was the babysitter. She wasn't offended that people noticed the kids didn't look like her. She liked the "compliments" that she was "too young" to be the mom. I guess I can understand why she wasn't offended. A mother *always* knows if the kids were born from her body, so she's probably not offended when they look like their father... but strangers should really keep their noses out of other people's business. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zaichiki Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 DS is very fair with freckles, and has blue eyes and reddish blond hair. Most people are polite with "Where d\id he get his eyes and hair?" I could *totally* handle questions like this. That's curiosity. That's not rude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zaichiki Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 My friend started to unbutton her pants and asked "Would you like to see my c-section scar?" :lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zaichiki Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 It doesn't even have to be strangers. DH's grandmother stood up during an extended-family Thanksgiving dinner and announced to G-d and country that she didn't think DS was DH's child because DS looks nothing like DH and ALL babies in their family take after their family. People can just be rude. Senility perhaps? :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 While I agree with the OP because culturally it is rather tactless to make comments of that nature, I also try to understand that people are just people--they are genuinely curious about observing the unusual and don't always know how to express it well. But really--is it that odd to wonder why someone is a mother of a child who is obviously of a different race than she? When my 1/2 Japanese son was born people often asked if I had adopted him. I could understand why--I'm blonde / blue-eyed and he was very Asian-looking as a baby. He now looks more like me, but still... We are one of only a few cultures where statements of the obvious and questions of the unusual are offensive...we as a culture are really overly sensitive. Hedgehog, These threads pop up from time to time (along with "the what people say to a big family threads"*). And basically what I have learned from them is that I should just smile at people and move on. Altho' now, it looks like some people get annoyed?offended?worried?angry? if you look at them soooooo... Head down, no eye contact, continue on in world on my own... ETA*I forgot talking to children out in public during school hours. Can't do that, either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scrappyhappymama Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 My dh is Latino so although I'm not that fair skinned my children are darker than I am. When dd was a few months old the manager at a local craft store came down an aisle toward me loudly cooing, "Ooh she's so beautiful! Where did you get her?" I was taken aback and stammered out, "She's mine." The woman reassured me, "Of course dear, grows in your heart and all that. But where did you get her from?" After I firmly stated that she is my biological child the woman look incredulous and walked away, only to return a few minutes later to explain that, "There was a just one of those Asian families in here. That's why my mind was going that way. Of course now that I see her from this side she looks exactly like you!" :blink: My husband is also Hispanic and I am a very fair-skinned Irish/Italian mix. Two of our four children are very fair skinned like me. Our oldest is a little bit darker and will tan a bit, but all three of these boys have blue or green eyes and sandy brown hair. Only one of our four boys takes after my husband, coloring-wise, with darker skin and very dark eyes and darker hair, and looks very much like I expected all my children to be. We joke that I must just really have very dominate genes. :lol: Sometimes my husband gets weird looks or comments from people when he is out with the boys without me. Fortunately the boys call him papa a lot, so people figure out he must really be their father. But my husband does worry that someone might think he is kidnapping them, especially if he is with only one of the boys, and he says he's been followed around a few different times in stores by people checking him out suspiciously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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