Not going right into college-advice needed.

[Catherine]

My oldest ds, some of you may remember, is going on an AFS exchange next year for the entire senior year. For the purposes of our umbrella organization, he is only a half credit of English short of graduating now, so fulfilling that next year should be no problem. We had planned to complete testing (check) and school visits and essays this summer before he leaves, and then I would basically do the applications next fall, to, one hopes, just a few schools.

 

He's lost interest in the college search in the past 2 months, and I suspect it's because he is beginning to focus on his upcoming exchange, learning the language, and all of the huge mental space that that occupies.

 

Yesterday we spent hours at a pre-departure orientation and when I asked returned students about applying while abroad, they were resoundingly negative about the idea, only one had tried it, and ended up taking that year off anyway.

 

He announced yesterday that he's not applying to colleges until he returns, meaning, he will take a "gap year" after he returns from abroad. I think this makes perfect sense, and wanted to do that anyway, if not for our consultant (in our umbrella) who told me it would look bad and not to do it. He's already said he'd take college classes, and probably work, during that year, and I have no concerns that he'll get "off track" and not want to go to college at all. He's otherwise a very strong candidate and I know is motivated.

 

Do you all think that this additional year off will look bad on college applications?

[FaithManor]

Not at all. Many colleges really welcome an older more mature student.

 

SWB has some insights into this in her education blog at www.welltrainedmind.com. Click on Susan's blog, then education blog, and go back to some of January and February's postings.

 

Her son Christopher is taking a gap year to gravel. She is a huge fan of the gap year and he was accepted numerous places. He is in India right now!

 

Our dd went to paramedic school and will work as a paramedic for a couple of years before going to college proper. Dh wants our boys to all have a gap year and do something such as travel, volunteer work, etc. It doesn't seem to be an issue here.

 

Dh's brother, many moons ago, took a two years off before going away to college. He was an expert sailor and taught sailing safety courses at a local marina while he thought about what he wanted to do in life. It was a great experience and he didn't have the slightest trouble getting into the college of his choice.

 

Faith

[Rosie_0801]

Working is a great idea. He can save money to pay for college!

 

Rosie

[Michelle in AL]

Something you might want to check into, at some of the colleges dd looked at, a student was considered a transfer student if they took any college courses after high school graduation, so if he takes classes that may affect what scholarships are available to him.

 

I'd check with the colleges he's interested in to be sure this is true.

[AHASRADA]

I took a year off after high school, because I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, if I even wanted to go to college (I was sooo sick of school!) and if so, what to study. I worked for a year, and that time in the real world convinced me that four years out of my life was not very long in the overall scheme of things, and helped me focus on my goals.

 

The best thing my parents did was to make me take the SAT anyway, so that I would have my scores if and when I decided to apply. If I had waited until I was ready for college to take the SATs, my scores would have suffered, and it may have delayed my application process.

 

I agree that he should focus on the language and culture of the country he is in, and worry about college when he gets back. He might even be able to start in January, if the school allows that. Otherwise, just encourage him to do "interesting, meaningful" things during his year off, in addition to working, like volunteering, mentoring, activism, maybe even something related to the language and culture he learned while abroad. That way it won't look like a "gap" year.

[Allearia]

I agree with taking a year off after the exchange. I did this my senior year, had to apply while I was abroad, and basically had a very hard time. I didn't focus on my applications and there was a school I really wanted to go to but just because of being far away, having to phone my essay in to my mom (though now he would probably be able to email!), taking the ACT while I was there with no real schoolwork for months, I got waitlisted. There were some other schools I wanted to apply to but it was hard to focus on any of the college application stuff while living in a foreign country with a new family. I still went to a great school and everything turned out fine but it would have been nice to have that choice (although obviously it was my own fault for not paying attention to the applications, etc, not blaming anyone just to clear that up).

 

Has he already taken the SAT and ACT? Again, you can take them abroad but the atmosphere might not be conducive to test prep!

 

I'm pretty sure a strong student, with a year abroad under his belt already, taking a gap year will not look bad. He can find some productive things to do during that year. Definitely look at SWB's blog posts on this.

 

What a great opportunity for him!

[J-rap]

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Edited February 18, 2023 by J-rap

[jld]

It sounds like it's a really smart idea to just let him chill the year after he comes back. A friend's daughter spent a year as an exchange student in Germany, and just couldn't focus when she got back. A year to readjust to America sounds like a wise plan.

[Sebastian (a lady)]

It sounds like it's a really smart idea to just let him chill the year after he comes back. A friend's daughter spent a year as an exchange student in Germany, and just couldn't focus when she got back. A year to readjust to America sounds like a wise plan.

 

I think it's easy to underestimate the amount of culture shock that you have coming back from a long period overseas. There is a lot of dissorientation because things that used to be familiar no longer seem so normal and there is an emotional disconnection to feeling so at odds with what used to be home.

 

I think that it might be hard to go right from overseas to full time college. You (and he) might want to read Third Culture Kids to sort through the weird emotions that an experience like this can create.

 

Will he be going to school in the host country? What sort of volunteer positions or internships might be do during a gap year? Anything that might build upon his exchange experience?

 

Does he know where he'll be going yet? I think he's going to have a great experience and that things probably will fall into place, even if he does do a gap year.

 

I was AFS summer exchange to Germany in 1986 and it not only helped me get into college but helped us get an overseas posting almost 20 years later. DH jokes that it was my answers in the interview about my previous experience in the country that helped him get the job. A bit of an exageration, but it certainly didn't hurt.

[In The Great White North]

It might be a good idea to apply to a "safety school" and defer it a year, just in case he changes his mind.

[Chris in VA]

It might be a good idea to apply to a "safety school" and defer it a year, just in case he changes his mind.

 

I like this idea.

 

Isn't the AFS exchange going to function as a bit of a gap year for him? I don't know your son or his situation at all--but I would want my child to have less pressure to make grades while in a foreign country, so I'd think twice about even sending the grades to the college (of course, you have to, since you are counting them towards his hs years--and you have to prove he went, right?). I think that's why many people do the AFS exchange AS a gap year experience--but that's only been ime, and it was actually re: foreign students coming here--we knew a dear child from Switzerland who came with AFS as a senior but had actually already finished his schoolwork in Switzerland.

 

Other posters have made good points about re-entry.