rockala Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 How can you? I want to teach my kids this as a skill- and I admit it is passed on, so if I am lacking I am passing this on to them. What sort of thing have you done to foster these skills. A book to read- a curricula with discussion? It seems we need to be both good listeners and speakers to be successful and that this may be much more important than I have realized. Especially now with two teenagers it is apparent- and they do not always want to hear it:tongue_smilie:. Some of their friendships are struggling. Is this normal with your teenagers? My kids to not have a lot of electronics. only emergency cell, no facebook etc. It seems the teenagers are not communicating the same way as before this stuff? Kathy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nissi Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 You could join a Junior Toastmaster's Club in your area or join the NCFCA - http://www.ncfca.org. Look into a local speech club or debate club or get together with other families for oral presentations. NCFCA website has resources you can use to help with speech and debate. HTH! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 DD, 13, did a Toastmasters program last fall and it was excellent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophia Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 The Institute for Cultural Communicators has local chapters you may be interested in. It's a Christian organization-that could be a plus or minus for you-anyway they do have one Chapter in Massachusetts. If a Chapter isn't feasible, look at their store. They have many resources that are useful even if you are not looking to compete in speech. http://www.instituteforculturalcommunicators.org/chapters/find-a-chapter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kindred Hearts Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 "Secrets of Great Communicators" by Jeff Myers is a recommendation from Diane Johnson in her book "High School @ Home". I haven't seen it IRL so I can't offer anymore feedback on it. Here's a link: http://www.christianbook.com/secrets-of-great-communicators/jeff-myers/9780805468823/pd/68824?event=WL&item_code=WW Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MommyThrice Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 I know I'm repeating myself, but I can't say enough about speech & debate. Not only has my ds learned to speak well, but he has learned to THINK well. And to think "on his feet" - quickly. As I was planning out his high school, I was researching the various writing skills he would need to accomplish. I was pleasantly surprised to discover that he already had proficiency in all of them because of speech & debate. He has written expository speeches, narratives, persuasives (lots of those!) and even a research paper (which did quite well in competition). All by 8th grade. This is a child that doesn't like to write - but writing speeches is a whole different matter to him. He didn't even know he was doing a research paper when he wrote his speech on Swiss Army Knives, but it was all there - including an MLA formatted bibliography. I highly recommend it! www.NCFCA.org Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Musicmom Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 We also have faced/are facing the same problem with ds. We tried for Toastmasters, but our local group wouldn't accept anyone under 18. And speech and debate didn't work out for us in the high school years either. I used a book called Communication & Interpersonal Relationships by Dave Marks (the author of Writing Strands; his company is called National Writing Institute) as part of ds's language arts in 9th grade. I folded it into his grammar & comp course and scheduled it out, having him read and implement each chapter. He found it quite helpful. I wasn't always aware of the implementation, but he told me later he was using a number of the suggestions "and they really work!" :001_smile: This summer, before he goes to college, I'm going to have him read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. I haven't read it myself, but my dh says it was one of the most useful books he ever read. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rockala Posted May 14, 2010 Author Share Posted May 14, 2010 some of these sound good- the books mentioned in particular. maybe I was not clear though, the speech and debate is awesome, I have seen how it helps with oral speaking skills. This is not the issue though, I generally am very verbal and my kids are as well. that is why I did not worry about this. We have judged a few speech and debates so we have seen the benefits first hand. I do not think that will prepare you though for relationship problem solving. Eithier with close friends, spouses or even your boss. It may help you land a job, but what about keeping it? Sometimes great speakers look great but how about their personal life? the kids are good writers- so that is not eithier. I know these things have great value, please do not think I am slighting them, that is not the heart of what I am getting at. Close intimate freidnship help, resolving issues, compromising, getting your feelings heard, developing good listening skills rather than trying to "WIN" a fight. But being balanced enough to not be walked on as well. kwim? Kathy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Musicmom Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 Close intimate freidnship help, resolving issues, compromising, getting your feelings heard, developing good listening skills rather than trying to "WIN" a fight. But being balanced enough to not be walked on as well. kwim? Yes--I think the Dave Marks book may address many of the things you've listed. I went back to my course descriptions just now and found the list of topics the book covers. Here it is: Eye contact, Verbal Reinforcement, Physical Reinforcement, Meeting people, Classroom Techniques, Interviewing, How not to be a bore, One-up-manship, Becoming what you pretend, Understanding others, How to disagree, How to reduce aggression, Body language, Speech requesting change. HTH! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIch elle Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 Available at CBD or RR: The Young Peacemaker - conflict & problem solving The Peacemaker Life Skills for Kids, Field (chapter 9 - People Skills) Ready for Responsibility, Barnes Yup, How to Win Friends and Influence People is a good one although there is much to like and dislike about this book. Definitely worth reading! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nissi Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 Kathy, for conflict resolution and relationship building, I love the book " Peacemaker" by Ken Sande. They have the children's version of this book called "The Young Peacemaker." Another one is "Making your Brothers and Sisters your Best Friends" by Sarah Mally. HTH! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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