ccmom Posted September 13, 2009 Share Posted September 13, 2009 The bottom line is that I had to drop out of a class that would require me to drive 60 miles per week and would be too expensive. Up until last week I was prepared to do this, but some new circumstances have come up that will make this particularly difficult. I am feeling so bad for backing out at the last minute, and I know it irritated the person who organized this. I ended up feeling so guilty, like I was letting my kids down and the organizer down, and so I told this person that I would try to make it work. Once I told her this, though, I panicked because I knew that it will be too hard for me to commit. I have a full plate and it seems like when I explain my circumstances I just sound like I'm making excuses. I feel bad about not doing the activity--like I'm denying my kids a unique and valuable opportunity, but I feel worse when I commit to it, as it is beyond my means right now. I think my biggest concern is that I've burned a bridge. Has anyone been in this position? How do you feel better about a decision when you know it is the right decision, but you created a negative relationship because of it? That is the toughest thing here and I feel horrible!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eight_gregorys Posted September 13, 2009 Share Posted September 13, 2009 Sorry to hear that you're feeling bummed. I hate letting others down as well. Especially when they've spent time organizing events and such. I've been on both sides of the fence on this one so I understand both points of view. I have a tendency to over commit myself and have had to back out of a coop class at the last minute recently. I felt like I was going to lose my mind if I had one more thing to do. I've organized events as well and had people back out at the last second, too. It can very frustrating, but I knew who was being flaky and who really had issues and weren't able to attend. It's best to do what you think is right for your family. Something that is stressing you out is just going to end up being a burden anyway and you'll find a lot less joy in doing it. (Ask me how I know.) If this person is a good friend, she'll understand you having to drop the class. Life happens and people need to be willing to understand that. If something this small ruins a friendship, you are better off without it. Imagine how he/she would react in a real crisis. KWIM? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted September 13, 2009 Share Posted September 13, 2009 I would just write a note to the person apologizing (even if you've done so verbally). It's hard to stay angry in the face of genuine contrition. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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