Michelle in AL Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 Like many teens, mine will procrastinate. She's had a hard month: AP test in the second week of May, a research paper due June 6, and a final test over 20 Ch due June 5. She's studied about an hour a day for the final the past 2 weeks for the final and is studying for the final about 2-3hrs/day this week. She just started her research paper 4 days ago. I asked her to start this multiple times throughout the past two weeks, and her response was either "I have to think of a topic" or "I got it." She is still doing notecards. It is due Friday. Today was her only day to have the entire day to study. Usually she works 8am-12 noon and we have youth week at our church from 5-10pm. I woke her up 3 times between 9 & 10 and then left. When I came home at 11:30 she was still sleeping, essentially wasting her full day to study. My initial response was to make her stay home from youth night. On the other hand part of me says she's old enough (15) to manage her time and if she fails she takes the grade. She is #1 in this class and has maintained that for months. She does work hard. What would you do, if anything? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newbie Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 Since she dilly dallied, I would make her stay home and study. This is not a regular test, its a final, which can affect whole grade. I am a tough mom, what can I say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Hen Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 Since she dilly dallied, I would make her stay home and study. This is not a regular test, its a final, which can affect whole grade. I am a tough mom, what can I say. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DianeJM Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 My son does the same kind of thing when he's overwhelmed and feels the work is more than he can handle. He just shuts down, and I can tell. I have to help him through it. He's not the kind of kid who will say, "Hey, I'm overwhelmed here, and I need help!" Well, I guess there's a fine line between encouraging and enabling. For the most part I have chosen to come alongside and walk him through the steps of how to get it all done. YMMV. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnitaMcC Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 Like many teens, mine will procrastinate. She's had a hard month: AP test in the second week of May, a research paper due June 6, and a final test over 20 Ch due June 5. She's studied about an hour a day for the final the past 2 weeks for the final and is studying for the final about 2-3hrs/day this week. She just started her research paper 4 days ago. I asked her to start this multiple times throughout the past two weeks, and her response was either "I have to think of a topic" or "I got it." She is still doing notecards. It is due Friday. Today was her only day to have the entire day to study. Usually she works 8am-12 noon and we have youth week at our church from 5-10pm. I woke her up 3 times between 9 & 10 and then left. When I came home at 11:30 she was still sleeping, essentially wasting her full day to study. My initial response was to make her stay home from youth night. On the other hand part of me says she's old enough (15) to manage her time and if she fails she takes the grade. She is #1 in this class and has maintained that for months. She does work hard. What would you do, if anything? My instinct is to let her learn from her own mistakes. I believe it is best to learn as a youngster where they have time and support at home to recover from that mistake. But I really don't know your Dd and so it really is what your gut tells you to do. My Ds#1 blew it for language arts this year in 8th grade at public school. He took accelerated (9th grade) course and got a 60%. Passed per school guidelines to get promoted to high school, but not enough for me to be willing to let him start 10th grade language arts curriculum that he is supposed to start homeschooling. And if he was to attend high school at PS.. they would remove him from honors English 9 to regular English 9. So this summer he has to do some work to "make up" that grade before he can start on the 10th grade curriculum homeschooling. It isn't his ability to do the work that is problem.. but that he didn't want to do it/he got way behind and the school did not cooperate by keeping him after for homework club or give Saturday detention per my request to kick his butt in gear). He took the ACT Explore test and scored in 98th percentile of students taking the test nationwide. Part of problem is the last quarter it was a lot of poetry..... he HATES poetry. And that was half his grade the 4th quarter. But he could have earned a solid C in the course if he did the vocabulary workbook assignments and did the research paper on time (and not 5 weeks late). So he has to do a research paper over the summer and some vocabulary work (for the lessons he refused to do in school-I have a copy of the vocab book-LOL) for him to "pass" the class-LOL. We have always told our kids anything less than a C is unacceptable (and that a C is only okay if they did their best!!!!). We know our kids are fully capable of doing very well in school. None of them really have a major weakness.. except for Ds#1 in handwriting and inferences (due to his autism issues). He just can't seem to learn the fine motor skills to hand write and he never learned cursive. Just couldn't do that. But that is why he uses computer for a lot of his writing... work that needs to be turned in for a grade. For inferences (in social type areas)... we just keep working on this area and he is making progress. And Ds#3 also has some trouble with writing and inferences (due to the autism). He is making great strides and has no problems learning factual information. Just some reading comprehension weakness and still writes some letters backward (not unusual I think for an 8yr old). Ds#3 is starting to learn to write cursive and I think he will do well with that. He seems to have the ability to see connected letters as words.... where Ds#1 can not. Cursive words just look jumbled scribbles to Ds#1. He learned to write his first name in cursive this year... still can't do his last name. He is starting to pick up some small words in cursive- 3-4 letter words as long as the words do not include f, z, b, k, r, s, u, v. These letters just don't make since to him. One of the rules we have put for homeschooling: nothing less than a B is acceptable to go to the next level of a subject. So if they don't get a B in algebra 2 then they have to remedial it before going on to geometry, etc. Just makes sense to not go on until the earlier course/knowledge is solid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cedarmom Posted June 3, 2009 Share Posted June 3, 2009 Since she has shown responsibility by maintaining her grade, I would let her go. I would ask if she is prepared and if she is not prepared, when does she plan to prepare. My son is like this. He is generally responsible, wants good grades, but can procrastinate. When I let him make decisions, he generally makes wise decisions. I also let him know that the reason I gave him freedom to schedule his time is because he does it wisely. At times I have taken away this freedom, and forced him to stay him, but only if he is showing a consistent habit of not doing work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle in AL Posted June 3, 2009 Author Share Posted June 3, 2009 Thanks all, your input has been very valuable. She has worked hard, is probably VERY burned out and that is showing. I prefer to let her take some natural consequences at this stage/age. So, I've discussed with her what she has to have done by when. I told her she's old enough to manage her time and I will trust her to do so and that I expect her to do her best, not just get by. She has the choice of staying home tonight, letting her sister babysit for tomorrow or trying to do everything. I told her, her grade is up to her and if she gets a grade that is not acceptable (less than a B) than there will be consequences. We'll see.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storm Bay Posted June 4, 2009 Share Posted June 4, 2009 Thanks all, your input has been very valuable. She has worked hard, is probably VERY burned out and that is showing. I prefer to let her take some natural consequences at this stage/age. So, I've discussed with her what she has to have done by when. I told her she's old enough to manage her time and I will trust her to do so and that I expect her to do her best, not just get by. She has the choice of staying home tonight, letting her sister babysit for tomorrow or trying to do everything. I told her, her grade is up to her and if she gets a grade that is not acceptable (less than a B) than there will be consequences. We'll see.... Coming in late, but I think this was a good choice in this situation. I always found I was bad at cramming; what I knew I knew. Studying is good, but at the last minute, it was more detrimental for me most of the time. Plus, if she's wrong and gets too low of a grade, she'll get a consequence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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